i woke up this morning and on my way out of the house I called the police on someone who was trespassing. There was some discussion with this person. Some of it was confrontational in the he-said she-said variety. The conclusion with the police was as I expected. I'd like to put aside the specifics and focus on the emotions and processing/thought patterns. I felt hesitant during the approach, defensive but understanding during the discussion, supported but shaky after leaving the scene. Happening at the place where I live added some personal safety risk.

What I noticed was the re-tellings. It was very important to me to retell the story. Not having roommates or a significant other, I rely on a larger number of people i know as friends or acquaintances for emotional reflection and another point of view. There were four re-tellings. The length and places of emphasis adapted to each person and situation. update: at lunch was another more detailed retelling with a close friend. that was particularly helpful.

The re-tellings, in my case, reflect a lack of emotional processing while the event happened. Getting the feelings out at the moment of the trauma is by far the most effective and healthy way to experience these feelings. I tend to become emotionally overwhelmed, and i do an extra-duty amount of filtering and measuring the other person's possible responses. Afterwards, I'm left with residual powerful emotions that take extra effort to process after the fact. Like hot candle wax, emotions happening now can be formed and directed. Once its cool, its a huge pain to do anything with.